Journal - November 23rd

Today I met with my supervisor to discuss about my sculpture creating process. I showed my supervisor my working video and she was happy with it. Although so, I am no where near finish with my sculpture. True, I still have about 2 weeks to make it but I should work faster. Today I was suppose to do a self-assesment on criteria E which is determining whether or not my goals and design specifications are met. I gave myself a grade of 1 today because I have only achieved 1 out of 5 design specifications. I have to keep on working. Hopefully I'll be done on time.

Journal - Penny Purnawati

Tante Penny, is what I call her. This very strong of a lady introduced herself to me in a hospital. There was a photo shoot in Siloam Hospital, Jakarta that day. She was wearing a red dress and her make-up on her face.  Her hair was very short though, it was only about 2 cm, her head shape can be seen. From a distance, she seemed bald. However, her face was very beautiful.
I talked to her in front of the hospital room. She spoke pretty much perfect English, her English was better than mine, I was embarrassed. We had a good conversation though. Tante Penny is a very out-going person, it was easy to talk to her and she was very open about her cancer. She told me the story from the beginning when it started.
She had known about the 'lump' since three years before she treats it medically. During those three years, what she did was give massage to it. Many rumored that by giving it massage, the lump will go away in time. But after three years, the lump is still there. She checked back to the doctor and found out that she has breast cancer and is in the third stadium.
The situation became critical. She had to do a scanning on her whole body to find out whether or not the cancer cells have spread to other parts of her body. If it have, she had no other choice. It was frightening. Thankfully though, when the results came out, the cancer cells are only growing in her breast.
She then decided to under-go mastectomy. She lost her right breast and had to do chemotherapy and radiation. I asked her how she felt about all that. She said it was hard. It was weird to look in the mirror and have a completely flat right part of the chest. Something tangible used to be there, touching the part where her right breast used to be was weird.
Nevertheless, she had full support from her husband of 12 years and from her friends and family as well. They all kept her going. Now Tante Penny is a woman who had inspired so many breast cancer patients.

Purnawati, Penny. Personal Interview. 22 Sept 2012.

Journal - 13 November

Today I have finished my sculpture design. It's been very hard for me to design this because I can't seem to get the design interesting enough (for lack of a better word). It's quite challenging to put all the emotions I got from my interviews into one sculpture design. This is more than just an illness. Breast cancer is losing a very big part of a woman's life. As hard as losing a husband, is losing a breast for us women. I have grown to know all these women I interviewed and I have been trying to do my best to make the best design, but this is all I can come up with. As of right now, this is the design that I will make a sculpture out of. If along the way I came up with a better design, I will change it then. But here it is right now.